I am back!!!

So my friends!

I took some tests to see why i wasn't getting pregnant, very horrible doctor told me very coldly that i wouldnt be having any more kids,

Devastated , we stopped trying. I stopped with my blog.

But literally a week later i fell pregnant!! Would you believe that!?

So all these people that say, when you dont try it happens, so true! But how do you stop trying without really wishing every month? Go to my horrible doctor! LOL

But she done me a favour really didn't she, she was meant to test me on day 21 on my cycle and actually tested me on the 27th! And so the tests were not right, Silly women. God bless the NHS

So people, i no longer have TWW, i have all the crap that comes with being pregnant, but i love it! I am nearly 12 weeks and all seems fine.

Love you all! Melissa

Tests!

Sorry not been around, I have been so ill!

It would appear i had a small miscarriage, or a chemical pregnancy so I am having tests to see if i can hold on to babies!!

So let s see how that goes, AF coming i can feel it, so defo no babies this month but wasn't trying

People keep telling me to not think about it and then it will happen,
The more i tell myself i am not thinking about it i am surely!?

How do you NOT think about it if you re really trying?? So i am trying to take relax approach now...
IF it happens it happens .... arrrggghhh.... no no, if it happens it happens .....

Where was I?

I know I know!

Where was I? Well guys, sorry to leave you all like that but I had to go for a while, ya see...

I had all the pregnant symptoms as you know! And saw a very faint line, so I tried not to get excited, then the next day another faint line so if course I will get excited now! But still trying to remain calm as I had 3 days to go yet.

Then 3 days early which is unheard of for me, AF was here? With a vengeance too! So many clots as well, but to spare you the horrible details it would appear to be a small miscarriage, since then I have googled it, its what we call a chemical pregnancy.

So I went to the doctors, and she was not helpful or tactful, she was actually angry that I had taken a test! She said I should not be taking a test till I am at least 10 days late on my period... WHAT! YEP YOU HEARD ME.

So what do we say to her?? 10 days? who in there right mind can wait a day let alone ten!? Also if i am ten days late then why take a test? surely that's clear I am pregnant? Stupid women. She went on to say it didn't count as I would have only been 4 weeks pregnant, and so it was just a false positive and if I hadnt of tested I would never had known so wasnt aloud to get upset about it... again ...stupid women. I was this close to asking her if she ever tried for children before???

So as you can see this was a little bit traumatic for me and so sat in my room for a week and didn't come out as I felt sick with it all as well.

I think i am going to take a little break for a while, that's probably when t will happen! But I have tests etc coming up now to see if I  have trouble holding babies in . So i will keep you posted on that!

Maybe something is wrong....

ok so I feel bad thinking I should get checked out because it hasn't happened yet as its only really been 5 months, some people try for years!

But the reason I thought I  would check is because I had to google the fact that I spot every month so far a week before the AF shows?? So thats weird, now some girl said she had the same and so after a year went to the doctors to be told she had issues with her progesterone levels?

This was the reason she would spot every month before AF , which is what I seem to be doing as well, as usual I went off on a tangent and found out loads of interesting info. This lady also had the problem, went to the doctors to get her progesterone levels built up with some pills and fell pregnant a month later which was good news so its fixable.

So I have turned into a testing freak! I done two today, yes two, because I took one this morning and I swear I saw a faint line! But have I got to the point now where I see what I want to see?? Am I the only one? please tell me I am not the only crazy lady when it comes to her TWW??? I just couldnt wait, tomorrow morning cant come fast enough...I need to see if it gets darker, but I can only see it if I really look and twist the test etc, I read thats not good, that doesn't count, but I am sure we all do it!!
So I took another one tonight and same, very very and I mean very , pass the magnifying glass faint!

Im Back, sorry for the delay

So, look at me , not blogging for days! Sorry about that

But there was nothing to blog, mother nature gave me nothing this month really , no fake symptoms , no high hopes, wouldn't it be typical if I was pregnant this time!!

But here we are 9DPO and sure enough it starts...

Yesterday i felt a little ill but i think its the new diet i am doing which make me pee for England!
Then i realised that my pee smelt a little stronger than normal, Oh finally something to Google this month, so sure enough I googles it and bam! Strong smelling pee sign of early pregnancy, hello phantom pregnancy you may begin.

I was reading some poor women really get down with the whole thing, its totally normal to go crazy I think, Its not just me! Im crazy after several months of trying, so for some takes years, I fell for you I really do.

So anyway, woke up this morning and my boobs really hurt so hope is beginning to set in once again, i had bad cramps last night and sure enough today a small spotting was going on, so sod it i took a test....

Well this test was a new one I have brought, just a cheap one, but better quality with early detection, the strip went red, then started to go white with one red line, ok so a BFN but then a few minutes later it all went red again? and the pregnancy line went very very white, is someone trying to tell me, look your not pregnant do we have to spell it out for you !! It was so weird,

So lets see what the next few days bring, AF due in 6 days, no long, but who am I kidding, we all know 6 days is an eternity!

Itchy boob?

Ok so here we are 3 DPO

Just in case for those who don't know DPO is days past ovulation,  sorry guys I feel like sometimes I should be explaining stuff a bit better for the newbies,

So, check me out! I have ichty boobs!  So I'm there scratching away thinking this is totally a sign, we all know that right?

Then it dawned on me, it was only one? But that's ok I'll Google it anyway... sure enough one ichty boob is a total sign, how amazing after all these months every little thing I have had is a sign some one in the world , one lady some where had it so it's a total sign right? Anyway I digress. .

So I get ready for bed , take my top off and sure enough, there it was, a big fat insect bite on my boob,  oh not so much a sign then... or is it? Wait a minute, insects are attracted more to pregnant women as their blood is sweeter sooooooo here you have it, still a sign! So fingers crossed for me.

Here we go !! 1DPO

So here we are then , 1 DPO

Well actually according to my app! I am 2 DPO so lets go by that even though I don't think it works very well!

So last month I was convinced...again! As I had implant bleeding?! like small amount of bleeding for one day after some cramps 10 DPO so that was weird. I was so convinced, why am i having these signs??? I also only had my period for a few days, again not like me so i actually took a test the day after AF stopped just to check, swear I saw a faint line? But I had to really look so.. no no BFN

So today here I am in a serious mood, everyone annoying me, clear sign! But lets see what the next 2 weeks brings, welcome and join me for my next TWW!